That is how I am feeling today.
I was not going to post anything today……….because today is a sad anniversary for us.
We all have em’
But if I did not post anything…anything at all…then my Mom, who reads my blog daily would be worried.
(really, we don’t HAVE talk much anymore….she just reads the blog to see how we are. kidding. not kidding. kidding.)
Yes, my big brother Mark was JUST precious….well that is what I have been told my whole life…especially by my Grandma…she still goes on and on about him…
“mark was such a beautifullllll baby”
Apparently I was the ugly runt of the litter. You can’t sense any jealousy can you?????
Really, he was a beautiful boy…and a cute teen…and a handsome (albeit SILLY) young adult….
I do miss him so much. We did not get along as kids…he was annoying. Well, he would tell you I was the annoying one…but whatever.
I wish I could take back all the angry words…the petty arguments…all the kid stuff you do to each other.
I like to think he and I would get along well now…we were spending more time together as we got older and a bit more mature….we had a better connection prior to him getting sick.
I am sure he would get a kick out of my silly girls…my brother was a true clown!!!
This is always a really hard day for my Mom. She goes to his grave, like she does several times a year and puts out new flowers.
My Mom is so great, that she spruces up Marks neighbors too. I’m not sure, but perhaps that is from her years in real estate: “keep the neighborhood looking good” or just the fact that she is down-right SWEET.
But, do you know when the last time I visited my brother’s grave was?
The day of his funeral.
I just can’t bring myself to go there….19 years, and I still don’t want to go.
Granted, he is in a different state than I…12 hours away.
But I could have been there several times...I just can’t do it. I am weak…
The Atlanta zoo 1989 with our hairy cousin
Give someone you love a big hug today or a quick hello on the phone …you don’t know what tomorrow will bring!
And for your viewing pleasure AND to make a big smile on all who reads this….especially my MOM…..
My favorite picture of my BROTHER:
Yes, my Mom dressed him as Mary Poppins for Halloween.
Right down to the purse. He was about 4…and I have to say, he nailed it !!!!