Literally, yesterday I took him out of the closet where he resides. Voila; it’s Christmas y’all!
I was digging in a box looking for some generic Christmas cards for Christmas $ tips and I stumbled upon some gems that I don’t think I shared on ye ole blog.
Did I ever tell you that as a child I was either told directly or overheard people talking about how beautiful my brother Mark was as an infant/child. All.the.damn time. Perhaps it was mostly my Grandma, who wasn’t born with a filter and I DO know she adored me, but apparently she couldn’t bear to look at me after seeing my Brother’s perfect angelic face. And that Santa up there? He was not going to open his eyes and take a chance on looking at my hideous face either.
Seriously though, this never bothered me. That’s why I’m dedicating this entire post to my Angelic and beautiful, beloved Mark. May he Rest In Peace knowing he was the pretty one. If I heard it once, I heard it 497 times.
One.More.Damn.Time. Santa OPEN YOUR EYES! I HAVE FEELINGS!
Ok. Maybe I just had too many feelings; Suzanne making a production about wanting a different flavor of free Santa Candy. And lookie there, Angel Mark, just smiling knowing he was the better looking child.
This year, I was given the ultimatum: Act right, smile like a good girl and Santa will make all your dreams come true even though you’re not as pretty as Mark. I have a feeling that Santa hit the ole peace pipe right before we stepped into line. Hey, what’s that smell? Skunks? But hey, I got my damn Barbie dream house, so I didn’t care what he was smoking. You know, in 2020 Santa would be locked up for the touching of small children & not wearing a mask, but not what he was smoking. Times.have.changed.
BTW: Mark totally took my Barbie dream house, redecorated it and gave me his G.I. Joe camping set while trying to convince me they were the same thing. He was way more into Barbie’s than Boy toys.
This is neither Mark or
Ugly Suzanne. This is Little Coach when he was around 4 years old! How cute is he? Looking damn angelic himself. What is it with the men in my life, always trying to outshine me?
Fun fact. Coach and I grew up in the same town on the East Coast of FL. He lived there from around age 2 or 3 until he and I moved away as adults. I lived in this town from birth until age 12, then I moved to GA for a few years and then was back in the same town in Florida at 15. (Georgia kicked my ass out, but I’m back baby!) We didn’t actually meet until the summer after I graduated from High School even though we lived close and were in the same High School for 1/2 a year. (it was a huge school)
Do you believe in serendipity?
Tell me when you see it.
Do you see it now?
There was only one mall in our town. That is the same darn Santa and the same darn year. I laughed when I found this and the Coach said, yeah, I remember seeing you and saying I’m gonna tap that in a few years.
I laughed so hard. I know it’s not the craziest kind of serendipity, but it’s the only kind this hideous looking girl has.
I hope you laughed at my
hideousness Santa antics today. Do you have any wonderful ‘sitting on Santa’s lap’ memories? I mean, if they’re the kind you can share on this PG blog.