What Has Four Paws, A Tail, One Ear And Is Still Adorable? Oops, I Did It Again.

It might not be visible to the naked eye, but the word SUCKER is written across my forehead.

In actuality, this OOPS IS all the Coach’s fault. Let me explain. A few weeks ago he arrived home in the morning, coming back from his workout. I was still in bed because I love my bed in the morning and he proceeded to bring me a cup of coffee. I sat in my comfy bed, drinking my coffee and perusing the FB on my phone. Our community in GA shared a post from a local animal rescue and there was this little girl who caught my eye; Lillie. Had I not been lounging in bed, drinking coffee, I might not have seen her.

I saw her sweet face and immediately thought of Lolo’s dog Max, a rat terrier mix, who I adore even though he’s outrageously weird.

Max working on his taxes last year.

Ok, before I get too far ahead, I know I’ve said 499 times over the past two years that Callie would be our last dog…no more dogs for us because we love to travel SO much and it’s a pain finding someone to stay with our dogs. But you know what? We ain’t going anywhere aside from GA now. And having a small dog that I can toss in the car seemed easy.

You know, I don’t really TOSS my dogs, right?

FYI, she has zero interest in toys. LIARS.

I inquired about her via email and asked if she was good with other dogs. This started a very long string of emails back and forth and obviously it was hook.line.sinker.sucker.

So a few weeks ago Callie and I made the long drive to our GA house to meet Lillie. Who drives almost 10 hours to fetch a dog with one ear? I do, that’s who. BTW: The Coach was on board; he’s almost always on board with my ideas and that’s why I keep him around. Plus, he brings me all the coffee in bed.

Callie and I met Lillie at the rescue office. Lillie seemed apprehensive and not super thrilled about big ole’ Callie. But we forged on. I DID ask if there was a return policy, just in case Lillie hated Callie. The goal was really for Callie to have a friend as she seems lonely at times. I brought Lillie to the GA house on a Thursday. My plan was to stay there with both dogs until Saturday or Sunday, then drive back to Florida. Y’all, it was a precarious few days getting acclimated. I ended up staying until the following Wednesday knowing that if I brought her all the way back to FL there was no going back. Plus, I really wanted her to get comfortable with Callie and I before we moved her to another location.

{Lillie’s back story: Her person, an older gentleman passed away in his sleep Jan 3rd. His stepdaughter found him at his apartment. Lillie had been living with him, for how long I don’t know. She (the daughter) then surrendered Lillie to the local animal shelter. The shelter then reached out to the rescue (a non- kill) group to see if they could place her in a home. And then Suzanne the Sucker enters the picture.}

She was so nervous for the first few days. I’m talking shaking so much that she could hardly walk; she was stiff and kept her head down. Peeing.all.the.time inside and out. She would sit on my lap and when Callie approached, Lillie would stiffen up, growl and snap at Callie. Like the kind of dog snapping that scares the beJesus out of you. The shaking thing really got me though; I honestly thought she was ill; possibly sepsis because she’d just recovered from spaying and having a hernia removed. I just knew she was dying…I was going back and forth with the rescue group via phone and the vet who did her surgery. They reassured me that she wasn’t ill, but she’s been through hell.

  • She was a wreck because she’d been moved from her home and away from her ‘person’.
  • She spent a few days at the pound.
  • She was then sent to a vet for spaying and hernia removal.
  • She stayed at a foster home while recovering from surgery.
  • She was then moved to the rescue group.
  • She then found the best thing ever: Me.

All of that happened in just over three weeks.

FYI, she was in the pic of our GA bedroom last week when I alluded that I was there for a pet project, but no one noticed it. I thought y’all were better than that.

After three days she seemed to warm up a bit to Callie, but not while she was on my lap. If Callie was laying down on a bed, Lillie would walk over, sniff her and lay with her. IT made me so happy. Then, she started shaking less. I put her in a bed at bedtime, but she would wake up and whine next to the bed asking to get in with me…and of course I obliged. She’s been sleeping in the bed with me/us every night now.

She’s stopped growling at Callie when she sits on my/our lap now. She’s great on a leash and listens pretty darn good. Today (Sunday) marks 10 days that I’ve had her.

On the trip home, I put her small bed in the backseat of my car. She hopped out in a hot minute and before I was out of the driveway, Callie stuffed her 70lb self in it. Before long, they were both in/on the bed and slept together for 99% of the long car trip home.

Tell me that’s not sweet. TELL ME.

Once back in Florida, she settled in nicely; she burrows in the bed in between us at night and hardly takes any space. She loves the Coach, which isn’t surprising at all. We’ve never had a dog this small before, so I’m constantly looking down and behind me as she follows me everywhere I go. Can you blame her?

They love laying in the sun together; probably talking shit about how I wear yoga pants all day but never do yoga.

OMG. It was SO cold while we were in GA. I hated, hated taking the dogs out for potty breaks and with a new dog that has bladder control issues, we were outside for walks A LOT. It was 25* when we left for Florida. She’s probably really digging the warmer weather.

I was told that she despite her loving being outside, her person, the older gentlemen wasn’t able to take her out much and she spent a lot of time in their apartment. She used a pee pad for potty time.

Oh, the Elephant in the room: Lillie’s ear. I was told (I called the step-daughter who surrendered her) that when she was a puppy, she walked into an electric fence and it singed her ear off. Not 100% sure it’s accurate because Lillie was passed off to her from someone else; so I’m getting the story third person. But, if you look at the scarring on her head, it mades sense. Funny though, Callie has part of one ear chopped from her ranch/cow herding days and our rescue boxer Ozzie had both ears botched from a home breeder; we have a thing for dogs and weird ears. She also has this ‘collapsing trachea’ that I read about in her vet paperwork; apparently that is a thing with certain breeds. She makes this little sound on her exhales, but its not like a snoring sound. I’ll refrain from dressing her in turtleneck sweaters.

Does this small dog make me look big?

This was a very long post, but I needed to document as much as I could here because I might forget it all next week. Wish us luck that Lillie continues to jive well here with us.

Did anyone else have an exciting week that included growling, shaking and lots of pee?


New Office Duds; Who Has The Best View?

Callie and I made an impromptu trip to GA this past week for a little pet project. I’ll share my little situation with you later this week; it’s kind of adorable.

*Vague much?*

~~Hey, if ya’ll want me to stop blogging about this darn house, just let me know. But, I’m not gonna. Can’t stop. Won’t stop.

While I was here though our desks that we had ordered way back in October were finally finished and were delivered. We commissioned them from the same gentleman who made our fantastic dining room table. Oh and a bench that is in our master bedroom. I thought I blogged about the finished dining table, but can’t locate it. Did I share a pic of the dining table? I can’t tell you how obsessed I am with it. Wait, I just eluded that I was obsessed, so there you go, problem solved. All amish made (no bolts/screws) and the tops are locally sourced Georgia pine, just stained.

It’s a dreary, cold and blustery day in N. Ga. Perfect for napping, reading and snuggling.

There is a ‘morning room’ off of our master bedroom. Well, that is what the GOLDEN PLANS called it; a morning room. Or is it mourning? Can I use it after hours? WHO THE HELL KNOWS. The previous owners had one desk and a daybed in there. Maybe they napped in there. IN THE MORNING.

A set of French doors leading to the morning/mourning room. I need a rug, but a dog bed will suffice for now.

The Coach wanted to make it a dedicated office for both of us, so we ordered two matching Amish made/Georgia finished desks. Are we disgustingly cute or what? Say it! My goal is to be disgustingly cute and in-love forever.

Coach’s desk. I gave him the printer and better view because he works a tad bit more than I do. And you know a tad bit means a helluva lot.

We are using extra dining room chairs for now, but eventually we’ll have dedicated desk chairs, but not really ‘desk’ chairs because, you know, aesthetics and all.

Suz’s desk. All I can think of when I look out the window is:

Merry Christmas! SHITTER’S FULL!

And for real, the wind is blowing SO hard that the door to the shitter keeps opening up….I have visions of the darn thing flipping over and toppling down the hill. I can smell it now…

Why the pretty porto-potty you ask? Doesn’t Suz and Coach have enough bathrooms? It’s for the big hardscape/landscape project going on in the backyard. Surely our new neighbors love us.

I wasn’t even gonna blog today, but seeing that potty out there just cracks me up. I hope everyone is having a lovely day whether looking at the mountains, a snow covered backyard or a pretty turquoise toilet in the driveway.

Bee well!


Fake News? How About Fake Doors? We Smudged The House To Avoid Being Touched In The Head.

I’ve been trying to work up the gumption to share something bizarre about the home we purchased in GA. The people who built this house were, um, lets just say special? They went through two builders; the first one quit because it was too difficult dealing with them.

We’ve heard stories from the neighbors and other contractors too about them being a challenging pair. We’ve had a few contractors over to see if they could help us rectify a few weird things, and each time I explain to the contractor that the previous owner must have been ‘touched in the head‘, they agree with me. But even with being ‘touched in the head’ they did make some good choices, but today I’m sharing the biggest negative challenge. This was to be their ‘forever home’; something happened in their family that caused them to need to sell and move out of state. SO, I really did have sympathy for them having to leave their dream/forever home. I just can’t imagine. With that being said, they built the house to what they wanted not thinking of resale.

When you enter the home there is a nice sized foyer, and it’s open to the main/upper living area. The first time we entered the home we went directly towards the porch doors to see the view.

Pic from Real Estate Listing-not our furniture, not our style.
Again, not our furniture, not our style.

We tried unsuccessfully to open any of the three sets of French doors in the living area leading to the outside. Hmmmm….we figured they were locked so we moved to the single door next to the dining area. Luckily we were able to get that one opened.

Real estate pic

We didn’t think much about the doors that didn’t open at the moment. We were really loving the feeling of the home; light, bright with very nice finishes.

We continued downstairs and loved this second/bigger family room. We noted that there was again three sets of French doors leading out the the expansive lower porch area; a mirror image of upstairs.

Real Estate pic, not our stuff.

Again, we could NOT get any of the doors to open, but there again was a single French door on the side that opened without issue. Hmmmm….so strange but we didn’t think much of it.

We went and looked at a few more homes in the area and none of them matched up to this one so my Aunt Trisha (AT, our realtor) called the listing agent and asked if we could return that same day to look again. While on the phone with the listing agent AT asked about the unlock-able, un-openable doors. And the agent stated that yes, they DO NOT OPEN.

HUH? They have handles on them, but no hinges. What the fresh hell is that about? Never have any of us heard of this, but we didn’t think it would be an issue to hinge the doors and use them like normal people would. Whatever.

Also, the dining room has lovely windows. They are all fixed. Un-openable.

My stuff, including the guy.

SIDE BAR: THE PLANS. Totally unrelated to the fake doors, but totally related to being ‘touched in the head’

We decided the next day that we would put in an offer and start negotiations. Shortly after that AT inquired about the floor plan/room measurements so Suz could start planning furniture. She was told (sternly by the way) that the plans would not be available until the house was sold and closed. HUH?

Several times over the negotiating the Realtor told us (Aunt Trisha) that the floorpans were SO expensive and CUSTOM to this home and the seller would like to put a premium on them and we can’t SEE them until the house is sold. Come to find out, the seller thought that if we had the plans, we might just go and BUILD our own house with them; this was brought up to AT unsolicited. Mind you, we’ve already given a hefty check $ for earnest money.

This conversation about the blueprints happened more times than you can imagine. At one point Coach told my Aunt to let them know “they should tape a quarter to the plans, drop them in the garbage and then they would have lost something.” The woman clearly was a loon and thought the WORLD of her plans. Maybe they had some secrets in them? The Davinci Code of GA?

So we finally DID get the plans, but not ONE freaking minute before we closed on the house. I’m not even kidding. When AT did the walk through/inspection prior to our closing, I begged for her to look in the attic, because we were sure the damn plans were hidden somewhere and I now wanted them to break the damn code or whatever. It became a joke.

Behold the most coveted plans in the world.

Back to the fake doors.

The beloved plans show WORKING DOORS, maybe that was what she wanted to hide from us? That she made the builder deviate from the plans?

Something fun and unusual about Coach and I? We love fresh air. We love to open our doors/windows weather permitting to enjoy FRESH AIR. Why? Because we are somewhat normal humans.


Moving on….We’ve had four contractors over to see how we can make the fake doors into real doors. One said NO. One said he’d do it then a few weeks later took it back and said NO. One said this wasn’t in his scope of work and then we found THE ONE. THE ONE ended up coming over several times and then returned with a window representative for more help. Guess what? We have to remove ALL of them and start fresh $$$.


What in the world would possess someone to put in fake doors. Right down to the knobs! What a knob. We will never understand, but had we known, we would have demanded to pay LESS for the house because it’s gonna cost us out the ying yang. And my ying yang is going broke.

Coach in our upper living area with OUR stuff and our Fake effing doors.

This is the view from the outside upper porch. You can see the three sets of fake doors, then a single working door on either side. The left side goes into an alcove next to the master, the right side goes into the dining room. We have to remove the upper transoms (because of door size) and we’re going to put in two sets of WORKING French doors and in the center we are doing a large plate glass for a killer view.

The doors/window are on order. Sadly, we can’t not afford to mirror this for the downstairs fake doors at this time, or ever.

I will of course share pictures when the job is complete sometime this year. Right now we have a huge landscape/hardscape project going on in the back yard because the people who built this house apparently NEVER planned on being outside; It was bare. Have you noticed a theme with us? There is always a project going on. Always.

So, anyone else buy a home from someone who might have been touched in the head?

Basically this post is me bitching about our beautiful mountain home. Do you still love me?