Many Thanks! What Are We Tearing Up Next? I’m A Lifesaver.

I had a very nice birthday weekend; thanks for all the well wishes. I started my 54th birthday morning with a cartwheel.

*She’s still got it!*

But she’s probably losing it.


Several years ago I noticed the tile on the backside of our hot tub was cracking. I mean, we all crack at some point, so why not do it where no one really notices? I had asked my pool maintenance people about it a few times but they never followed through. Finally, I decided that not only did that part need to be replaced/updated, lets do all of the spa tile and the pool waterline tile too. The pool is almost 19 years old and just like our hair styles, it needs updating. 

I called a few pool renovation companies back in February to help us update the spa and waterline tile. Turns out, we also need to redo the pebblecrete surface throughout the entire pool and spa. 

Do you call it a spa or a hot tub? I use both interchangeably. 

The pool from around 7 years ago.

Never is there a time where a project doesn’t roll into 3 or 4 more.

When you redo the pool surface, you also need to update the drains to meet the ever changing codes for safety. The cage, while it still serves its purpose (to keep the bugs and critters out) is really overkill with the amount of aluminum; you can get away with less poles and better views with 2021 engineering. The pavers? They are in good shape, but they don’t match any of the pool tile selections that we liked. The house color doesn’t match the new decking material we selected, so painting will commence in the not-so-distant future.

And if you’re updating the deck pavers, you have to remove the outdoor kitchen as it SITS on said pavers.

Th hardest thing for me to chose was the waterline/spa tile. I walked into the showroom with one criteria:

I don’t want blue tile; everyone has blue tile!

Also Suz:

I told you I was losing it.

A few friends will be taking a good portion of our pavers to reuse for projects at their homes.

The pool cage was taken down last Thursday and all the aluminum will be recycled. I love to update things, but also NOT add too much to the landfill.

Lillie: WTH Mom?

Friday morning I was walking by the glass doors and noticed something scooting across the naked pool area: A baby box turtle. Wait, did you happen to hear me squealing? HE IS SO CUTE!

It took all the strength I had to set him free in the yard. I pray he doesn’t come back onto the lanai because he isn’t a swimmer. I’ll forever worry about him.

I hope everyone had a lovely weekend.


The Day I Tried To Eliminate My Remaining Marbles

This is a post I wrote in 2009; I stumbled across it recently, read it and had tears streaming down my face. I’m sharing so you can get another glimpse into the Insanity That Is Suzanne.

Random family photo from 2009. I appear to be NORMAL.

It started off as a typical weekend day.
I slept in, then moseyed myself to the kitchen for a cup of coffee.
I checked on the girls and they were being typical as well; one on the couch watching TV, one on the computer watching YouTube.
I made our bed; Coach left a few hours earlier for softball practice.

I went out to the backyard and fiddled with my compost.
I found several ant piles en route and went back and treated them.
I cleaned the guest bathroom.

I sent the girls to their rooms to clean. 
I took the dogs out to the driveway to run a bit and get their exercise.

I heard something down the street that sparked a memory. I stopped in my tracks, cocked my head sideways trying to determine if I heard what I thought I heard. It was a familiar sound, but I was not sure it was real. 
It was a sound that I had not heard in many years.

My heart started beating fast.

I was getting a weird feeling in my stomach. My hands and my feet started to tingle.

I didn’t feel right. I was about to lose it.
I had to get the girls’ attention. AND NOW.
I couldn’t be bothered with going back into the garage and through the mudroom door into the house to get them.

I needed them NOW.

I started calling for them from the yard. LoLo…..Linds!!!!!

I ran to Lindsay’s bedroom window and started banging, screaming her name. LINDSAY!

The dogs looked at me like I was a crazy. Little did they know, it would get worse.


Linds pulled the blinds back and looked at me like I was a crazy person. Because I was.
I screamed to her through the window:


She pursed her lips and said: You are lying.
I screamed through the window: 
No, I’m not, he’s really coming…he is coming down our street!

Get out here NOOWWW!!!

In a flash, she came running out the garage with my wallet in hand.
I suppose she believed me now.
Then I looked at her and remembered her sister had been fooling around with a flute earlier; maybe that was what I was hearing. 

Was I overreacting?
Am I really hearing the ice cream truck?

I asked Linds, and she confirmed: Yes, there is a musical vehicle heading this way.
She started jogging down the driveway and then suddenly she put on her brakes and turned back towards the house.

She realized she still had on her Hello Kitty boxer shorts and decided to change.

I almost lost it.

She ignored me and ran back into the house.

I just knew she was going to miss this golden opportunity.
It was as if I had injected with a shot of adrenaline; I was crazed.

I started yelling into the house from the garage: Run Run Hurry up Run Linds, HURRY!

By now Lauren heard all the racket, came out and looked at me like I was insane.

Me: Hurry and run down to the street and get an ice cream. 
The ice cream man is coming!!

She stared at me with a fearful expression and went back into the house.

Linds came running back out of the house and I could just now see the front of the ice cream VAN coming into view.
Me: run down there before it passes by!

You would have thought the ice cream man was giving away baby dolphins by the way I reacted to his arrival. 

Linds ran down the driveway, opened the gate and met the ice cream man in the street.

I had such a huge grin on my face by now, satisfied that we DID THIS, but my blood pressure was still very high.
I ran into the house for the camera, knowing that this may never happen again.

Lindsay came back in with her ice cream and we had a good 15 minute laugh about the whole thing. 

I came to my senses and realized what a kook I am and his made me laugh all the more.

We live in a semi-rural area, so I’ve never seen an ice cream truck in our ‘hood. It just doesn’t happen.
They just don’t come around, or if they do, we may be inside and we would never hear them coming.

Later on after the incident Lauren said she thought someone was breaking into the house and I was telling Lindsay to run for her life.

Lindsay told me that the neighbors must think that I am insane; she said I made it sound like someone was chasing her down the street with a knife as I was telling her to Run Run Run.

I explained to the kids that as a child we had the ice cream truck coming by all the time and we could hear it blocks away. We would run from wherever we were playing to our house to find some money to buy said deliciousness.  

Of course we could not hear our parents in the next room telling us to do something, but that truck…that truck was music to our ears.

Then it dawned on me. I really did want an ice cream and in all the craziness, I did not get one.
I called Coach and asked him to pick me up a push-up pop on his way home and he did; no questions asked. Geeze, that was the stressless way to get an ice cream in 2009.

When was the last time you bought ice cream from a truck? Did you have the joy of chasing them down as a kid?

Signed, your favorite lunatic.


If It’s Not One Thing, It’s The Water

At our house we’re either having issues with the electric gate, the internet, the a/c or the water.

Lately, it’s been the a/c. It is working, but intermittently.

I’m focussing on the positive, it works most of the time.

We’re making headway on most recent house updates. The new tile flooring is in. There is an issue with the grout, but we’re not going to worry too much about it until our tile installer returns from his annual trip to Romania in a month.

The new trim is in around door casings, new baseboards are installed. The cabinet doors have all been removed from my craft room; the painting of those will happen off property by a professional. The remaining cabinet parts are being sprayed in house, so lots of plastic is draped around.

Enter Jeff Spicoli

We have a couple of painters here to paint the new trim and some walls that need to be repainted. These guys have been here before, we knew what to expect. While both are very nice, trustworthy people and good painters, it’s quite evident that they know their way around a bong.

On Wednesday, I had I saved up all my errands for one day and departed the house at 11:30. I worked out, then I stopped at Total Wine (as Linds says: meal prep!), Walgreens, Publix, Post Office, Tile store, & our condo to pick up a package. When I arrived back home at 4:30 our two regular (Spicoli) painters had left, but my other painter was still here working on the cabinet painting.

When I checked in on him he said: Your water isn’t working.

My face and my good attitude immediately fell.

I had warned this particular painter the day before about our faulty toilet, but failed to tell Spicoli one & two. I assumed they could read. One should not make assumptions.

{This sign has been posted directly over the sink for the last 2 years. Spicoli #1 said he thought it was a bible verse and didn’t read past the first line}

We are on a well system here with a lovely Reverse Osmosis tank. We have fabulous water with the RO system, we could sell water to the people who are obsessed with bottled water. BUT, if you let the water run and run, the tank will RUN out of water. If the tank runs out of water and the pump/motor/etc continues to run, something will break.

Guess who closes at 4 and doesn’t offer after hour services? Our water service company.

Ya’ll I was done. I wanted a shower. I wanted to wash my hands. I wanted to flush a toilet. I’m fairly certain that either PMS or Peri-menopause (it’s a crapshoot) coincided with this water situation because as aggravated as I was, I really felt sad. Down. I wanted to cry. And I wanted to break into the wine that I had purchased for a later date.

I looked out at the pool, said to myself in my best Ellie May Clampett voice: Here we go again, another bath in the cement pond.


Then I remembered we have a lovely condo across town with no guests in it. And it has water. And a/c. And internet. And wine. All the things I require.

I grabbed my coffee creamer, iPad, a bag of grapes and departed my humble abode. The Coach decided to rough it and stay. He said: You can just shower there and then come back home.


I needed some time to wallow in my aggravation. And it was better to do it alone as I felt like I could be snappy and rude; he didn’t deserve it. He isn’t the asshat who can’t read.

I was back home at 8:30 Thursday morning. Refreshed and happy.

It’s Thursday at 11:10am and my water people still have not arrived.

Me looking longingly at the clean pool and wondering if I’ll be bathing in it tonight, driving across town or maybe I’ll just start a new lifestyle.


Your almost smelly, aggravated, slightly warm, hormonal friend Suz


EDITED TO ADD: Thursday at noon, we were back in water business.

EDITED TO ADD: Thursday afternoon Spicoli 1 felt horrible about it all and thinks he has the faulty handle fixed. I’m not taking down my sign anytime soon.