After doing my spellcheck on this post, I realized it’s all over the place directionally, but I’m gonna leave it as is.
Unless you live under a rock, you’ve heard about the 23 & me or the Ancestry.com DNA tests.
It’s pretty interesting, isn’t it? A lot of us are connected to people that we don’t know and probably won’t ever know.
The girls and I did the ancestry.com DNA tests back in 2018. The Coach decided to NOT do it because the government will have too much information and could frame him for a crime one day.
I’m kind of kidding, but kind of not kidding.
I was secretly hoping to find an unknown biological sister or brother out there, but damnit to heck, my parents apparently weren’t out there willy nilly having children and not claiming them. Thoughtless.
I could use a Sister or Brother.
If you’re new here, you don’t know that I had a brother; Mark. He passed away in 1990 at the age of 25 ( I was 21) from AIDS. You know, before the Medical community could even try to remedy the disease as people were just losing their shit if they thought you might have AIDS and that you could catch it by being in the same room with someone with AIDS. It was horrible for Mark; he’d barely begun his life and it was taken from him.
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| Suz and Mark at our Dad’s 2nd wedding. Don’t we look thrilled? |
So, it would have been nice to have another sibling (I’d prefer a cure) to help with those years of Marks illness, then to have a sibling two years later when my dad suddenly became sick and died within 11 days from cancer or to have one help with the trauma/drama after my father died because of his very new third wife who turned out to be a liar, coke abuser, and just all-around bad person. (I should write a post about accidentally seeing her on Maury Povich spewing lies)
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| Mark and Dad; approx 1988-89 |
That was a long way to get around that I wish I had another sibling.
I digress….the point of this post is that, well, I can’t really mention any names to go with the point of this post. Hmmmm….here goes:
Someone that I know very well, has found out in the last few years that he/she has a 1/2 sibling. There won’t be anything to come of it, because this half sibling’s Mother’s dying wish was for him to never know his biological father because he was raised by a man who wants to only be known as his father.
Get it?
But now, since the DNA websites are all the rage, there is another family member that has popped up. A 1st cousin for someone that I might be very close with.
This cousin has contacted several members of someone’s family and we pretty much know it to be 100% true, but the biological parent refuses to take the DNA test. (ass!)
By the way, both of these people have popped up in Lolo and Lindsay’s DNA as matches.
The Coach and I were discussing how frustrating it must be, to not know your family history.
Good, bad or otherwise; my childhood was far from ideal, more dysfunction than function, but at least I know why I am who I am.
Do you remember the old saying: You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have the facts of life, the facts of life.
Wait, that’s not what I meant, but that was a great show. {Tootie!}
I suppose you never know what something like that really feels like (not knowing your history) if it’s not your story. I can empathize a lot of feelings, but not that one.
On the other hand, shared DNA does not always mean family.
Sometimes I wish we’d adopted and added to our family when the girls were younger; that way they would have more siblings and we could be a part of a good adoption story. Like a Two-Fer.
Please don’t advise that it’s not too late, because it is. We’re completely spoiled with our freedom of travel now that the kids have flown the nest.
Reading this again, I should divulge that I had a step-sister for many years; her Mom and my Dad were married (the second marriage where Mark and I are so ecstatic up there) for 9 years. She and I are not real close, but we do talk on the phone on occasion and via Facebook; she’s had a train wreck type of life And blames our childhood on her bad decisions. Ummmmm….we lived in the same house girlie for many of our years. She actually appreciates when I give her good advice even though I’m pretty harsh with the truth. She wouldn’t be the one I would call if I needed sisterly advice or help take care of a family member.
Luckily for me, I have several friends whom I consider soul sisters; for that, I am blessed.
Have any of you taken the test and found some new leaves nuts in your family tree?
Was anyone able to follow my rambling mind today?
