Thanking The Texas Weather For Being Crappy, A Great Reunion Times Two.

My girlfriend D’Anne had a planned visit with us the Friday before last; she was in Florida for work, arrived to our place on Friday afternoon and was scheduled to depart on Monday afternoon, but the Dallas weather had other plans. I think they call it Winter?

I spent a long weekend with her around this time last year in Orlando, before that she and her family were here eight years ago and before that it was eighteen years since our last visit. If you recall, D lost her son Kelly last year; she and I are good at commiserating together about such a huge loss, but we also laugh our biscuits off; it’s a balance.

She is traveling a path that I can’t imagine surviving, but she is doing it with grace, love and humor.

Easy Friendships are the Only Kind I Subscribe to.

I had only scheduled a Comedy Club visit (Linds and her BF joined us) and virtually nothing else while D was here. No worries. She and I have a good time sitting outside, chatting it up by the pool, walking the property with Peanut looking for different varieties of caterpillars, marveling at our Florida birds and orchids; we never run out of things to talk about or laugh about. We’re No Fuss, No Muss.

We did end up visiting the Botanical Garden, (it was very hot, Thanks Florida!) we had lunch at the marina, I took her by the Condo which looks like a scene from Beirut and I let her hop out of the car, go put her feet in the sand at the Beach. (I’ve yet to get a parking sticker on my car, so I didn’t park-also, the water part of the gulf is closed since we have so much damage/crap/bacteria from hurricane Ian)

Another afternoon, I shared with her our favorite Mom & Pop Grocery store and you would have thought I took her across the world on the Concord; she’s easy like Sunday Morning!

Peanut wasn’t complaining about having another Mama all week.

By Wednesday I realized I had let the laundry go. I mean grow.

Granted, our hamper isn’t huge, but still, this is unprecedented! I lost Peanut for a minute and thought I might have to dump the clothes….alas, she was under the bed and the laundry could wait another day because Fun needed to be had.

The Weather in TX finally calmed it’s tit’s and D flew home on Thursday afternoon, but I was so thankful for the extra time together. While D was here, we got to see Linds three times and Lolo once; that’s what I call WINNING!


Friday afternoon our friends Don and Kelly arrived with Peanut’s boyfriend Louie and much fun ensued. It was two and a half days of this:

Mind you, we have a large house and yard, but they like an Up Close And Personal audience for all the shenanigans.

We had a lovely dinner that night at one of our favorite places.

Saturday brought us to a concert/fundraiser for our local Wolf Sanctuary.

And by Sunday afternoon, the three of us were exhausted.

Done like dinner…

Did you even realize I was MIA?

Do you have friends in your life where they require nothing in the Entertainment Department?

XOXO

My Favorite App, Can We Stop Division In The Grocery Store & Who Will Win The Bread War?

Gigi turned me on to this grocery app and I absolutely can not live without it. I keep separate lists for everything under the sun; the great thing is you can share the lists via the app or you can text the list to someone within the app, if say, they are going to Costco for you, which is my favorite love language.

What Happened To Grocery Inclusive & Finally an Orgy On The Pasta Aisle

I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned it here, but my husband is the Condiment King. He can’t live without something added to his meals; spicy mustard, hot sauce, his own creation of mayo with some sort of hot sauce. After hurricane Ian, we had to clean out the fridge and start fresh. Honestly, I liked the look of an almost bare fridge; uncluttered and clean. But since I’m the Self Appointed Best Wife Ever, I’ve slowly been recouping his favorites, but for so long I couldn’t find sriracha. I’d looked for it on the condiment aisle every week and it was never there. Finally, this past week I opened up my Publix App to see what I was doing wrong, and all along I should have been on the international food aisle and not the lowly Basic Condiment Aisle. I was put off by this; why must we segregate nations at the grocery store? It’s 2023 for heavens sakes!!

Another fun shopping thing happened on the same day: I’d had orzo on my grocery list app for so long, I’d forgotten what I wanted it for because the stores were always out of it. I’m talking six months at least. Finally, last week I found orzo; they had so much orzo and I declared it was an Orzo Orgy!

Let’s Break Bread (over someones head)

There might an egg shortage happening OUT THERE, but there’s a Bread War happening IN HERE. *Suz waves hands towards the kitchen*

We don’t have much use for bread in our house and generally I don’t buy it at all, but occasionally, I’ll keep a loaf of Dave’s bread in the fridge on the off-chance someone decides they could use it. (Like when I get a hankering for an egg Sammy) I specifically keep it in the fridge because it will last weeks without getting moldy.

My husband is 100% against bread in the fridge; says he doesn’t like the way it tastes. Which is weird because if I don’t even buy it, he never mentions the taste. Sassy much, Suzanne?

About six months ago, I bought a loaf and I let it sit on the counter after he filed another complaint about Fridge Bread.

*THIS IS WHERE I AM REDEEMED SHE SHOUTS FROM THE COUNTERTOP*

One morning the coach came in from the gym rushed, he had to clean up and run to a meeting so he asked me to make him some eggs and a piece of toast while he showered. If you could have seen my EAR TO EAR GRIN when I opened up the Countertop Bread and it was moldy. Why must that bring me such satisfaction? Marriage. Marriage is the only reason.

This past week I purchased a loaf of Dave’s bread and I separated half of it to a ziplock bag and put it in the fridge for me. The other half went into the pantry drawer for him. (To get moldy, I can only assume)

I’ll let you know how it works out.

Are you on Team Fridge or Team Counter?

XOXO

If You Have To Say It Out Loud, It’s Probably Not True.

When my girls were in Middle school I carpooled with a Mom who lived around the corner; her kids (twins) were one or two grades above Linds and one year below Lolo. As much as I loved their mom, the twins were a bit obnoxious. They loved to brag about the size of their home, how much it could sell for, their new clothes, new phones etc…I just can’t with braggers, even if they’ve barely hit puberty, but being the mature adult, I bit my tongue a lot.

I recall one day when picking them up from school, the daughter was scrolling her texts said to me: “You probably don’t know this, but I’m really popular.”

The words spilled out of my mouth before I could stop myself:

Well, if you have to say it out Loud, it’s probably not true.

Obviously, I’d had enough with her sassy ass. I could hear Lindsay in the backseat giggling at my remark, and since then, that’s been a One Liner with Linds and I.


Recently, the Coach and I attended an event/dinner/awards at our local university. In attendance, and sitting at our table was a former athlete who is only two years older than our Lolo. Anyhoo, this young lady is beautiful, smart, very sweet, appeared very accomplished and personable.

But as much as I admired her for those things, and she did seem interested in the other people around her, I also knew in the first 21 minutes of introduction that she (and her husband, who is my age) have several Chiropractic practices, a Ferrari, a large house, plenty of travel opportunities that require much luggage and her Chanel purse needs its own chair.

Woah Sister, save some stuff for later!

The Coach and I discussed it on the way home and had a good snicker. Not the candy bar, a giggle, although I could use a snicker bar because I’m not myself when I’m hungry.

Anyhoo. It made me wonder, if I had all those ‘things’ at 32, would I feel the need to boast about them? No. I would not. And today, at the ripe old age of what I am, I’m kind of the opposite. I prefer to play down the ‘stuff’ and focus on what really matters: My Stellar Personality.

Not to brag, but I’m damn popular. In this house. Most of the time. Really, mostly at dinner time, but you know.

Anyone run into a not.so.humble bragger lately? Were you as unimpressed as I?

XOXO

What’s New? Peanut’s Boyfriend, Stressing About Non Life-Altering Decisions And Looking For A BOGO Discount On Spaying; Which Is A Life Altering Decision.

We had a lovely weekend on the East Coast seeing our good friends Don and Kelly. Two of our songwriter friends were at a another friends’ house, two doors down playing a party for 50 of her nearest and dearest. It was a good time for the humans, and even better for Peanut.

Peanut had a blast playing with her friend Louie. It was 24 hours of non-stop foreplay; for Peanut, not me. All the nibbling, chasing, rolling around, cuddling, etc..for our entire visit.

She was completely exhausted for the next 24 hours after we departed and since Louie is snipped, we didn’t end our weekend needing a Plan B.


I’m really not that stressed, just busy. But who else wakes up at 3am and contemplates every decision you’ve ever made and the ones you still need to make?

What is consuming me lately? Thanks for asking.

~I’ve got to make lots of decisions on the redo of our beach condo; thank you Hurricane Ian, I had it just how I wanted it aside from one thing which of course I will share with you. Floor tile, countertops, furniture. New windows? Do we want to do wood shutters again? I’ve spent about 79 hours trying to decide on the couch/chairs for the living area. Do I want the slipcovered couch with chaise or do I want the upholstered couch with the return bumper?

Do you also wonder these things? I sure hope so.

I’m fretting over the couch situation because as pretty as the last couch was, it wasn’t comfortable and I complained about it at least 79 times in the four years we had it. I found it to be stiff and shallow; don’t we all know someone one like that? The funny thing is, we’ve had lots of guests there as well as renters and not one other person complained about the couch. Goldilocks who?

RIP stiff, shallow couch and lovely deep, comfy swivel chairs.

We will do most of the condo exactly as it was, but a few things we’re going to change up, you know, so I can stress about new choices.

I know it’s only 1400 square feet, but it’s consuming me.

Please, Baby Jesus do not let us have another hurricane with storm surge until I’m in heaven eating rocky road ice cream on the daily!

~I scheduled Peanut for her hysterectomy, but now I think I have to adjust it because Louie is coming over for another playdate and there’s no ‘keeping her calm’ when her man is in town.

~Also, and maybe the biggest thing, I need to schedule a hysterectomy for myself. *sigh* I’ve known I needed to to this since November, but I’ve been putting it off. I know I’ll be ok, but I’m still avoiding the necessary. I’ve not written about it because I know some people are freaked out by ‘health talk’ and I don’t want to be the one to freak someone out. Well, today anyway. But, the mechanical parts of my lady kitchen no longer serve me and they’re causing slight issues now, and hopefully by removing them, I won’t have bigger issues later. (My Mom had a hysterectomy at 40, was left with one ovary; which became cancerous and took her from us.)

**Edited to add-I am post-menopausal, so my hormones have already left the building.

So, how did you enjoy my rant that started with Dogs making out, moving onto couch talk and ending with my upcoming major surgery? Can you imagine how things ‘swing’ inside my head if this is only a blog post.

Have any of my friends had her interior Lady Parts removed and can share any good advice. I mean, aside from avoiding it altogether? (Mark, don’t worry about answering 😜)

XOXO